Adventures in Eotaras

In this adventure the party has split. Sia and Ada have left Pax, Temeki, and Lando on their own in the swamp. Let's find out what happens...

Tumeki crested the crenelated fortress wall with the grace and stealth of a rhinoceros. From his hiding place behind a crate of ballista bolts, Lando saw a figure in the guardhouse—some sixty feet down the wall—whip around and focus in their direction. Two small shambling plant monsters emerged from the crane stairwell next to the gatehouse and turned toward them.

Alonco’s voice spoke in Lando’s head: "Eyes on the prize, Lando. I’ll get the cleric."

Lando turned to see the little fairy bolt off in the opposite direction along the wall. He popped up and threw a psychic dagger at the first mound. At the same instant, Tumeki let out a battle cry that shook the wall and charged the two mounds.

Damn it. This stealthy raid just went tits up.

Pax sighed as he heard Tumeki roar. Lando’s plans always assumed stealth, but Lando was not as stealthy as he believed—especially when Tumeki was involved. Lando kept encouraging him with that stupid mask. Besides, the Lady preferred open and honest action. If your motives were pure, why hide them?

He was jolted from his reflection. Did the stone wall just shake? That had to be his imagination. He looked up and saw Alonco peer through a crenelation and motion, pointing further down the wall. Was that a signal?

Pax said, “For the love of the Lady, my good man, just say it!”

Almost simultaneously, he heard a squishy impact from the other direction and peered around the corner to see a shambling mound hit the ground. His eyebrows raised. Just then, another mound launched over the crenelations—this one achieving short flight. Pax paused briefly to admire the loft and distance.

“Ah, right Alonco. Good idea. Let’s go the other way. The Lady would agree with this tactic,” he said, and ran in the direction Alonco had motioned.

As Tumeki threw the second shambling mound, Lando fixed on the plant monster in the gatehouse.

“Eyes on the prize,” he muttered, rising and throwing another psychic dagger. The throw was true—he could always feel the good ones. Tumeki, mid-hurl, narrowly avoided the blade as it struck the gap in the doorframe and blasted the plant monster in the gatehouse.

Tumeki roared again.

Alonco’s voice entered Lando’s mind: “Tell the cleric to prepare to leap.”

Fucking leap? Pax doesn’t leap. This was going to be good.

Smiling, Lando messaged Pax. “Alonco says get ready to jump.”

Lando sprinted along the wall after Alonco. He glanced down into the courtyard. A humanoid plant monster and two mounds were heading toward the crane structure. Two more shambling mounds entered the courtyard as another humanoid plant monster exited a building on the far side. At least Tumeki wouldn’t get bored.

Just as Lando’s mind locked onto a route down, a high-pitched squeal shattered his planning. He skidded to a halt as Pax—squealing like a tossed pig—soared overhead, clearing the wall and arcing into the courtyard. His arms pinwheeled and his legs pumped like he was running through air. The sun glinted bravely off his plate. Alonco, clinging to Pax’s shoulder, looked down and winked. That little guy had style.

As Lando followed the arc of the jump, his gaze passed over Tumeki—literally ripping a humanoid plant monster in half and throwing the top half over the wall.

Holy. Shit.

Pax landed in the courtyard in a cloud of dust—and, to his amazement, on his feet.

“What did you do to me?” he exclaimed.

“Excellent jump,” Alonco replied from his shoulder. “I’m not sure the squealing was dignified, but the Lady would be proud of the landing.”

“You let me worry about what the Lady would find dignified,” Pax muttered, adjusting his half plate.

He looked around.

Three buildings on the far wall. Two shambling mounds closing in. A humanoid plant monster exited the center structure.

“There. The heart is in there—it has to be,” Pax said, pointing.

“Got it. Deal with those two mound things. I’ll get to the heart,” Alonco replied.

“Deal with? I’m worthless in a fight! I’m coming with you.”

A purple psychic dagger flew past Pax and hit one of the mounds. Lando. That would help.

“Alonco, perhaps now is the time not to be seen, my small friend.”

“Good idea,” Alonco said—and vanished.

Pax watched the shambling mounds move toward him. He composed himself, found his center, and whispered a prayer.

“Hear my words, good Lady. Protect this vessel that it may serve your ends.”

A claw slashed at him but glanced harmlessly off his armor. Pax moved past the second mound and made for the center building.

Behind some crates, Lando watched. Pax cast something—probably a protection spell. He wasn’t sure what kind. Pax, Sia, and Ada were always vague about their magic.

The first mound wasn’t distracted, but the second one couldn’t seem to see Pax. Definitely protection magic.

Lando really didn’t understand Pax. He wore too much armor, carried no weapons, and constantly tried to save every wretch they met. If his moral sermons worked half as well as his healing magic, they’d all be better off.

The crane structure shook. Tumeki was brutalizing another humanoid plant on the stairs.

Lando refocused on the humanoid in the center building—it was pointing at Pax. Crap. He’d have to do something.

Just then, the door to the third building crashed open. A dog-like plant monster leapt out, followed by the asshole they were looking for: Putriseri.

Pax ran toward the center building. A humanoid plant blocked his way.

Behind it, he saw the door open and close—Alonco made it in.

He steeled himself. Tumeki would just run him over.

So Pax did the same.

The creature raised a hand. A black needle shot toward Pax and bounced off his armor, but the impact shattered his bravado.

He yelped and dodged.

Then the third building’s door crashed open. Putriseri stepped into the courtyard.

“I told you to leave this swamp!” he bellowed—and charged.

From his cover, Lando watched. For a giant plant, Putriseri moved fast—and he was closing.

To his credit, Pax stood his ground.

Good man, Lando thought. Line them up.

Alonco’s voice chimed in: “This building’s empty!”

Lando replied: “Putriseri came from the third one. The heart’s there!”

He messaged Pax: “Alonco says the middle building is empty. The heart’s in the one Putriseri just came out of.”

Pax looked toward the third building. Message received. But Putriseri was blocking his path.

Lando opened his hands. Purple energy swelled. He stepped out, hurled two psychic daggers. Both hit. Putriseri arched and screamed—a sound like stepping in rotten garbage.

The other humanoid plant turned back toward the center building.

Lando messaged Alonco: “He’s coming back in. You’ve got company!”

Pax saw Putriseri recoil. The path was open.

He charged past him toward the third building.

A dog-shaped plant blocked the way.

“The Lady guides my steps, foul beast. You shall not stand in her way!” Pax shouted as he bowled through.

Putriseri turned and followed. If he got into the building, Pax was done.

Lando concentrated. He had to hit again. Two more daggers launched and slammed home.

Putriseri screamed, dropped to a knee.

As Pax entered the building, Putriseri hurled the dog-thing at him. It missed and bounced off the wall, landing in a heap.

Tumeki vaulted the crenelated wall. His stomach growled. He was so hungry.

These tiny people ate tiny plant food and drank from tiny cups. That old lady in the swamp had given him a cupcake—it tasted like dirt.

He landed atop the wall. Two plant monsters ran toward him.

“MORE FUCKING PLANTS! Tumeki HATES PLANTS!”

He charged. One went flying. The second got thrown.

A black needle stung his side. Another one came from the gatehouse.

He roared and slammed open the gatehouse door, ripping out a plant monster. Half of it stayed behind.

Another needle hit. One more was on the crane stairs.

Tumeki hurled the torso and leapt down the stairs, hammer in hand.

Ada’s voice echoed: “Tumeki, eating salads is good for you.”

“FUCKING PLANTS! Tumeki DON’T EAT PLANTS!”

He smashed another monster. Two more blocked him.

The stair structure shuddered as Tumeki leapt, roaring.

Lando crouched behind crates. Two plant mounds had seen him. He was boxed in.

The structure trembled again.

“Tumeki DON’T EAT PLANTS!”

One plant rounded the crates. Another behind.

Lando smiled—and blinked out of existence.

The Ethereal Plane was quiet. Muted gray tones. Lando liked it.

The plant creatures wandered off, confused.

Sia had never explained much about this trick—but it worked. Time stretched here. Or felt like it.

He took a moment to think.

Back at the canal, Sia and Ada had split off to bring Parilla’s regiment. Pax, Tumeki, and Lando were sent to scout the Condante fortress.

A strange choice, sending an armored cleric, a half-orc barbarian, and a rogue into a swamp—but Lando was fine with it.

They had been ambushed by fairies led by Alonco Periwinkle. After some banter, Alonco deemed them trustworthy and agreed to help.

Along the way, they met the Marsh Soother—a cryptic seer with confusing knowledge of the past and future. She gave them three vials of antidote and five cupcakes.

Then came the plan: Alonco’s village would distract the fortress while Lando let the team in from above.

It might’ve worked.

But Tumeki had a mask. And no stealth.

The whole thing went to shit.

Lando reappeared. The noise of battle slammed into him. Tumeki burst from the stair structure and charged Putriseri.

Lando smiled and started hurling daggers at the remaining plant creatures. Outside the fortress, Alonco’s distraction began—machinery and fairies making an enormous racket.

Perfect timing.

Tumeki exited the stairs and saw Putriseri.

“FUCKING PLANTS!” he roared, charging.

His flaming hammer slammed into the creature with a concussive blast. Putriseri dropped.

Tumeki tore the body apart—and ate an arm.

Lando finished the last of the plant monsters as Alonco and Pax investigated the third building. They found a trapdoor and a staircase leading down.

At the bottom, a cavern opened up around an enormous, corrupted tree. Pipes and machinery pumped noxious fluid. Etheric energy powered it all.

Tumeki raised his hammer and began smashing pipes.

Pax approached the tree. He saw runes carved into the bark.

A deep voice rumbled: “End me.”

Pax jumped. “Who are you?”

“I am Oaken Fury,” the voice said. “End me.”

“We can help. Heal you.”

“I am beyond saving. The rot has set. Tell Spruce Deepvine what you found.”

The party found nothing of value—except barrels of oil.

They looted the whole fortress and nothing, absolutely nothing.

They doused Oaken Fury. Tumeki raised his hammer.

“Stop!” Pax said. He made a trail of oil to the stairs.

“We’ll light it here. That gives us time to escape.”

Tumeki and Lando exchanged glances—and agreed. Alonco shook his head sadly.

They charged up the stairs and burst through the gates as flames engulfed the courtyard. The blast knocked them down the slope.

The fairies brought them back to the village. They gave Tumeki kegs of beer—he drank two at a time.

Pax and Lando consulted the map. Parilla’s regiment was nearing the canal.

Time to reunite with Sia and Ada.